Why and what to tell family, friends and colleagues
Ex-partner and/or Stalkers will not only stalk you but on average they stalk 32 people around a victim. They will follow friends and family social networks, they may contact them (often pretending to be someone else) to try to get information about a victim or to spread rumours.
Why do you need to tell others?
- If your friends, family or work colleagues do not know about your ex-partner/stalker or do not understand the seriousness of the situation, they could provide them with information used to hurt you.
- If they know you are being stalked by your ex-partner/stalker they are more likely to notice something suspicious e.g. a neighbour may notice someone watching your house.
- They can help you gather evidence
- They can give evidence if a case goes to court. They can testify not only about specific incidents but the effect that it has had on you. This could help improve chances of prosecution.
- They can help change the work environment or the ways you socialise to increase your security and avoid contact with your abuser
- The support they offer will help you deal with your situation.
What do you tell them?
You don’t have to go into details about your relationship with your stalker or what has happened. Make clear statements:
- There is a person who is obsessed with you
- They have been told to stop contacting you but they have refused
- It has been reported to the police
- The situation is making you feel very unsafe
- Tell them not to approach or contact the ex-partner/stalker
- Give them the name and a description or picture of your ex-partner/stalker.
- If know any alias, email, phone numbers or profiles or licence plate numbers then provide those as well
What can they do to help?
- If the ex-partner/stalker contacts them ask them to save any evidence such as text or emails.
- If they suspect your ex-partner/stalker has called, ask them to note the date and time. Also to write a brief description of conversation.
- If they suspect they are talking to your ex-partner/stalker they should immediately hang up. But they should inform you and make a note of the date and time.
- If they witness anything suspicious ask them to contact you.