Why is it happening to you?

People harass and stalk for many different reasons. They:

  1.  can't accept a break-up
  2.  are jealous or controlling
  3.  are infatuated
  4.  want revenge
  5.  enjoy hurting others
  6.  are predators
  7.  have mental health issues.

Common traits of online abusers

Online abusers often appear to be very ordinary, charming and intelligent. They are very convincing and able to manipulate others. They often have several of the following characteristics:

  • Controlling
  • Anger easily
  • Jealous
  • Narcissistic
  • Sense of entitlement
  • A bully
  • Manipulative
  • Deceitful
  • Blames others for his problems
  • Views themselves as a victim of circumstances, society, family etc.
  • Can't take no for an answer

What is digital abuse?

Today we lead digital lives. We use mobiles, social media, email, shop online and much more. So, if someone wants to upset, scare or intimidate us they will use technology to do it. Digital abuse includes:

  • bullying
  • harassment
  • stalking
  • Partner and ex partner abuse
  • trolling
  • hate campaigns
  • revenge porn
  • ruining your reputation
  • using your social media to contact friends & family

The four dark personality traits

The are similiar personality traits in abusers, stalkers, trolls, peadophiles, rapists

  1. Narcissism: Tendencies of attention-seeking, charm, vanity, grandiose yet low self-esteem, and a willingness to manipulate others.
  2. Machiavellianism: Coldness, immoral thinking, long-term manipulation, blunt practicality, and hunger for money, success or power.
  3. Psychopathy: Antisocial behaviours, thrill-seeking, manipulation and impulsivity.
  4. Sadisism are distinguished by their enjoyment of cruelty. 

Signs of a psychopath

Psychopaths display different traits depending on their disorder, but common signs include superficial charm, a grandiose notion of self-worth, the need for stimulation and impulsiveness, pathological lying, the ability to manipulate others and a lack of remorse and empathy.

Experts claim people usually find psychopaths intriguing, but can't put their finger on why. 

This is down to incongruous behaviour because psychopaths tend to do a lot of acting to deceive, or mimic normal reactions, sometimes changing their views and reactions quickly.

For example, Mr Wells said upon meeting someone, he tries to become 'the most interesting person they know' and presumably adopts suitable interests and responses to do this.

His response also gives away another common trait - a grandiose notion of self-worth - in that he can be the most interesting person in the room.

Psychopaths occasionally tend to exhibit unconvincing emotional responses, with slip-ups including tone of voice or body language.

This may be because they are unable to understand emotions such as fear and love, but can mimic them.

Generally psychopaths' 'emotions' are shallow and short-lived and there is a manipulative ulterior motive to showing them.

For example, Mr Wells said he offers to do favours and tells false secrets to people to gain their complete trust.

He also displays insincere charm - another trait associated with psychopaths.

He says: 'I keep secrets, and tell them fake secrets to further gain their trust, and once they trust me enough, I ask for favours, reminding them of the favours I did them. I can get literally anything from them, which is incredibly useful.'

Psychopaths typically display an incredible ability to manipulate others and sometimes take pleasure in doing so. 

Psychopaths often have an air of superiority about them. Even expert Dr Hare warns that anyone can be duped during a short interaction with a psychopath.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-3767545/Inside-mind-PSYCHOPATH-Researchers-feel-fear-don-t-recognise-danger.html#ixzz4Iz5USCKu