Overview of abuse since leaving relationship

This is to get an overview of the type of incidents you have been experiencing since you seperated from your partner. It will help to give police and other support workers an idea of the different types of incidents and abuse you have been experiencing.

You will also need to keep a digital log. This is where you record specific incidents and any ongoing issues. The digital log will be used to identify which laws if any have been breached, where evidence lies and the damage the abusers behaviour has caused. All of this is essential in order to help police to investigate and decide if a prosecuation could be brought.

These questions are related ONLY to this person's behaviour AFTER you seperated.

How long were you together?
If you were married what is your legal status
How long have you been experiencing issues?
Have they EVER strangled you?
Have they ever threatened you with a weapon or used an object like a weapon?
Have they pushed, punched, kicked, bite, pulled you by the hair,slap or hit you since you seperated?
If they have been physical (see above) to you since you split up how often has it happened?
Have they or do you suspect they damaged your property?
Have they show up at your home, work or when you were outat time you weren't expecting them?
When you have seen them, have they tried to prevented you from leaving?
Have they entered or forced their way in your home uninvited?
Have you had to install additional security in your home?
Have they forced you to have sex/raped you?
Financial
Have they made it difficult to earn a living?
Do they avoid paying child support?
Are they angry about the financial settlement and use it as an excuse not to provide for the children?
Have they refused to provide financial nformation or lied to the the CSA
Have they left you with bills or debt?
Did they create debt in your name after you split up?
Have you incurred legal costs due to their behaviour
Have they caused property damange
Have they attacked your reputation?
Have they contacted your work trying to cause your problems?
Have they false reports to the police or other agencies
Have they spread or try to spread rumours about you to people in/at
If they spread rumours how did they do it
Have they sent intimate or embarassing photos to friends or put them online?
psycological
Have they tried to isolate you?
Do they blame for things that went or going wrong in their life
Have they told you that you are crazy or mentally ill?
Do they claim you are lying about their previous or current behaviour
Do they use words like hysterica, exaggerating" or "you don't kow what you are talking about" or " you are remembering that wrong or lying to you or others
Did they still criticise you even though you are no longer together?
Do they say things to make you feel bad about yourself?
Do they pick fights or try to anger you
Do they say or do things because they know it will upset you?
threats and intimidation since you serperated
Have they sent you unwanted gifts
Threaten to take you to court over money or child access
Have they threaten to take the children or stop visitations?
Have they threaten to leave you penniless?
Have they threaten to harm (physical, reputation or financially) friends familly?
Have they become angry or threatening because you started a new relationship?
Have they threaten suicide?
Have they threatened or reported you to third parties
Have they made you feel frightened with their body language?
Child related issues
Do the children have court or contact with them and do you comply with that court order?
Is their access supervised?
Do they compromise over time, visitation, or other issues?
Have you incurred costs because they sent the children home with missing items?
Do they provide financially for their children, after school activities, clothes etc
Did they insist you are responsible for all the child contact arrangements?
Have they talked to the children about you in negative or harmful way?
Have threaten to take you to court or report you because they weren't happy with how child contact was being done?
Have they shown up more than 10 minutes early for child contact when you weren't expecting them?
Have they brought the children back late by more than 15 minutes?
Do they use the children to send you messages either by telling them to tell you soemthing or sending email, letters, text knowing that you will see them?
Do they make decisions about the children in order to cause you upset, inconvience or money?
Have they been threatening when picking up children for access
Have they video or tape recorded access handover
Have you had to arrange access handover away from your home?
Have they used the court system to abuse you
Have they used the court system to make you spend funds on a lawyer?
Have asked the courts to have you psychological assessed
Has they made vexatious complaints or acusations to
Have they made complaints against individuals or agency supporting you
Have they lied to CSA to avoid child support?
Have they claimed parental resposibility to get information about you (not specifically the children)?
Do they use parental responsibility to cause disruption?
Surveilliance
Do they show up unexpectantly and you don't know how they know wher you are?
Do they know things about what you are doing or saying and you don't know how they find out?
Do they have people reporting information about you to them?
Do you feel like you are being watched /undersurveilliance?
Have they contacted friends or family to try to get information about you?
Do they contact school, gp or other organisations to try to get information about you?
Have they sent you pictures or videos that you didn't know they had?
Have they bought mobiles or computers either for you or the children?
If they bought mobile or computer do you suspect it has been tampered with or had spying software added?
Have you found a tracker or on your car?
Have you found tracker in children's posessions?
Have you found listening devices or video devices in or around your property that you didn't place there?
Do you know or suspect your email, social media or other online accounts have been accessed?
Do they monitor your online accounts?
Do they monitor your friends or family onlne accounts?
What has been the impact?
Have they caused financial problems *
has their action made it difficult to earn a living?
Are you fearful?
Survey
Survey
realisation of that I had been controlled/abused
that I lost who I was/my self esteem/ self worth
flashbacks to events in the past
constant stress and worry
contant questioning of myself
financial impact
anxiety about what will happen next
worrying about the impact on children
how other people have reacted to you
Isolation
the response from police, family courts
the lack of support, understanding